Therapy for Pregnancy After Miscarriage, Stillbirth & Baby Loss
Stop Living Scan to Scan. Reclaim Your Pregnancy. Rebuild Your Motherhood Journey.
You tested positive. But instead of joy, you felt fear.
This Pregnancy Feels Different
Even when the test turns positive, your heart can't fully relax.
You're listening for every symptom. Checking for blood at every toilet trip. Holding your breath at each scan. Wondering: is this really our turn, or will loss take this one too?
You want to trust this pregnancy - but your mind keeps spinning worst-case scenarios.
This isn't overthinking. This is trauma.
Your body remembers the heartbreak. Your mind remembers what it felt like to lose. And every cramp, every scan, every silence can feel like it's happening again.
If you're here, maybe you're exhausted from white-knuckling your way through this pregnancy alone.
There is support that doesn't force positivity or tell you to "just relax."
I'm Aleksandra, a BABCP-accredited CBT therapist specialising in pregnancy after loss. I help women carry both the fear and the hope - without drowning in dread.
Does This Sound Like You?
In my work as a CBT therapist specialising in pregnancy after loss, I’ve noticed something again and again - the fear doesn’t go away as pregnancy moves on. It just changes shape.
What feels most overwhelming in the first trimester often isn’t the same as what hurts most later on. Each stage brings its own emotional challenges, especially when you’ve already lived through loss.
You might recognise yourself in one of these phases, or in all of them.
Wherever you are right now, you’re not strange or failing - you’re responding to something that’s been deeply frightening.
𑁍 First Trimester: "I'm terrified every time I go to the toilet" 𑁍
You check for blood obsessively. Every twinge, every cramp sends you spiraling. You can't let yourself bond or believe this pregnancy will last. You're holding your breath until the next scan.
𑁍 Second Trimester: "I can't let myself bond, just in case" 𑁍
You felt the baby move, but instead of joy, you feel terror that the movements will stop. You can't enjoy this pregnancy because you're waiting for something to go wrong. People say "you should be happy now" but you're still living scan to scan.
𑁍 Third Trimester: "What if something goes wrong during birth?𑁍
You're so close now, but the fear is overwhelming. What if something happens during labor? What if you get to the end and lose the baby? What if you can't handle the birth after everything you've been through?
If any of this resonates, you're not broken. You're traumatised.
And trauma isn't something you can "think your way out of." It lives in your body, your nervous system, your scan-day panic, your 2am Google spirals.
But trauma can be treated. And you don't have to do it alone.
Why Pregnancy After Loss Feels So Different
When someone says, "you should be happy now," it can feel like you're failing at something that's meant to be beautiful.
But here's the truth: pregnancy after loss isn't just anxiety. It's trauma.
Your body remembers:
- The moment you found out something was wrong
- The scan where there was no heartbeat
- The physical pain of loss
- The grief that followed
And now you're pregnant again - and your nervous system is on high alert, trying to protect you from more heartbreak.
This is why:
- You can't "just relax"
- Positive thinking doesn't quiet the fear
- Every scan feels like you're waiting for bad news
- You can't bond "just in case"
This isn't a mindset problem. It's a trauma response.
And it needs trauma-focused support - not just reassurance that "everything will be fine this time."
Want to understand why the pregnancy after miscarriage feels so different?
Read: Pregnancy After Miscarriage Anxiety: Why It Happens and How to Cope
Right now, your birth might feel like something you're carrying every single day - in your body, your mind, the way you move through the world.
Here's what changes when you process birth trauma with trauma-focused therapy:
What Changes When You Get the Right Support
In Your Body:
𑁍 The constant hypervigilance eases.
𑁍 You stop checking for blood ten times a day.
𑁍 You can breathe fully again, not just shallow panic breaths.
𑁍 You still feel scared sometimes, but it's not consuming every moment.
In Your Mind:
𑁍 The intrusive thoughts ("what if I lose this baby too") lose their grip.
𑁍 You can think about the future without spiraling.
𑁍 You stop punishing yourself for not feeling "grateful enough."
𑁍 You can hold both fear and hope without guilt.
In Your Daily Life:
𑁍 You can go to scans without spending the week before in terror.
𑁍 You can talk about the baby without immediately adding "if everything goes okay."
𑁍 You start to believe - cautiously, slowly - that this pregnancy might actually result in bringing a baby home.
𑁍 You feel the baby move, and instead of panic, you feel a flicker of connection.
This doesn't mean the fear disappears completely.
But it becomes manageable. It doesn't run your life. You're not just surviving this pregnancy - you're actually living through it.
Most clients notice shifts within 6-8 sessions:
- The scan-day panic becomes less consuming
- They can bond with the baby without terror taking over
- The "2am Google spirals" decrease
- They feel more present, less like they're just white-knuckling through
- They can actually imagine bringing a baby home
This isn't about forcing positivity. It's about processing the trauma so you can reclaim this pregnancy.
This isn't about forcing yourself to feel positive. It's about learning to hold both the fear and the hope.
Together, we work on:
How Therapy Helps You Reclaim This Pregnancy
✿ Breaking the 2am Google Spiral ✿
So your nights feel less like survival mode and more like rest.
✿ Steadying Yourself at Scans ✿
Not because the fear vanishes, but because you have tools to breathe in the waiting room.
✿ Releasing the Guilt When Symptoms Change ✿
Learning to notice your body without assuming the worst every single time.
✿ Making Space for Both Grief and Hope ✿
So you don't feel like you're failing if joy doesn't come easily.
✿ Letting Connection Come in Its Own Time ✿
Relieving the pressure to bond right now. Allowing it to unfold without shame.
✿ Processing What Happened Last Time ✿
Because unless we address the trauma from your previous loss, the symptoms will keep showing up in this pregnancy.
✿ Calming Your Nervous System ✿
So your body isn't always stuck in fight-flight-freeze, waiting for the next disaster.
This isn't about pretending everything's fine.
It's about finding ways to live through this pregnancy without drowning in dread - and letting yourself experience moments of steadiness, connection, and even cautious hope.
For a more in-depth look at how CBT helps during PAL:
How to Cope with Anxiety in Pregnancy After Miscarriage: CBT Therapy & Support
My Approach: Trauma-Focused Therapy for Pregnancy After Loss
Pregnancy after loss isn't just "pregnancy anxiety."
It's trauma - and it needs trauma treatment.
Here's why my approach is different:
𑁍 I'm Not Just a CBT Therapist - I'm a Specialist Perinatal Trauma Therapist 𑁍
I don't treat pregnancy after loss like general anxiety. I treat it as the trauma response it is. This means working with your nervous system, not just your thoughts. With 10+ years in NHS perinatal mental health and specialized training in trauma-focused therapies, I understand the layers of pregnancy after loss - the grief, the hypervigilance, the terror, the guilt for not being able to enjoy this pregnancy.
𑁍 I'm Trained in Trauma-Focused Therapies 𑁍
I use Trauma-Focused CBT, CFT for perinatal period, and I'm completing EMDR training (May 2026). These approaches process trauma at the nervous system level - helping your body understand you're safe now, not just trying to convince your mind.
𑁍 We Create Practical Tools You Can Use Today 𑁍
This isn't just talking about feelings. We build grounding techniques for scan anxiety, ways to manage the "2am Google spiral," strategies for connecting with your baby without terror taking over. So you don't feel like you're failing if joy doesn't come easily.
𑁍 I Understand the Nuances of PAL 𑁍
From sleepless nights to panic at the Doppler sound, from emotional cushioning to scan-day spirals - I understand the layers of pregnancy after loss. Your previous loss shapes this pregnancy in ways most people don't see. I do.
Still wondering if your anxiety is “normal” or worth support?
7 Things I Tell My Clients Who Are Pregnant Again After Miscarriage — That They Can’t Find on Google
What Therapy Looks Like And How We Work?
Session length: 50 minutes
Format: Online (secure video), UK and EU-wide
Frequency: Weekly or fortnightly (your choice)
Pricing: Individual session: £130
How We Work Together
-
- Share what happened in your previous pregnancy
- Talk about what you're finding hardest right now
- Ask any questions about therapy
- Decide if we're the right fit -
Together, we'll:
- Understand your trauma response (hypervigilance, emotional cushioning, bonding avoidance)
- Identify your biggest triggers (scans, symptoms, milestone dates)
- Set gentle goals for this pregnancy
- Decide on session frequency (weekly or fortnightly) -
Early sessions focus on:
- Processing what happened in your previous loss
- Understanding why your nervous system is on high alert
- Building scan-day coping strategies
- Breaking the 2am Google spiralMiddle sessions focus on:
- Working through guilt and emotional cushioning
- Making space for cautious connection with this baby
- Addressing shame ("why can't I just be happy?")
- Partner communicationLater sessions focus on:
- Birth preparation (especially if you had late-term loss)
- Addressing tokophobia if it's emerged
- Anticipatory grief work (planning for postpartum)
- Closure and transition out of therapy -
You're not just getting CBT techniques. You're getting trauma treatment from someone who understands the layers of pregnancy after loss.
Therapeutic Approaches I Use
Your care is grounded in clinical research, trauma-informed practice, and 10+ years of NHS mental health experience.
These are the frameworks I draw from - always adapted to your story:
I use evidence-based approaches including:
→ Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT),
→ Trauma-Focused CBT,
→ Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT),
→ Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT),
→ Nervous System Regulation techniques,
→ and EMDR (completing certification May 2026).
But here's what matters most:
This isn't a one-size-fits-all process.
We shape the process of therapy together - so you leave each session with something that helps you today, not just "someday."
This isn't about forcing yourself to feel positive. It's about finding ways to live through this pregnancy without drowning in dread - and letting yourself experience moments of steadiness, connection, and even cautious hope.
Why Work With a Specialist in Pregnancy After Loss?
You deserve support from someone who knows this terrain - not someone you need to educate about it.
✿ BABCP-Accredited CBT Therapist ✿
10+ years experience in perinatal mental health, including NHS perinatal mental health team placement with specialist supervision
✿ Specialist Perinatal Mental Health Clinician ✿
Currently working part-time in NHS perinatal mental health team—I see pregnancy after loss, birth trauma, tokophobia, and postnatal presentations daily
✿ Trauma-Focused Training ✿
Trained in Trauma-Focused CBT, CFT for perinatal period, and completing EMDR training (May 2026)
✿ Deep Understanding of How Trauma Shows Up in Pregnancy ✿
From sleepless nights to panic at the Doppler sound, from emotional cushioning to scan-day spirals—I understand the layers of pregnancy after loss
✿ Not a Generalist ✿
I don't treat "a bit of everything." I specialise in perinatal trauma: pregnancy after loss, birth trauma, tokophobia, postnatal PTSD
This mix of specialist training and NHS perinatal experience means you won't have to explain why you're terrified at "good news," or why hope feels dangerous.
I already understand. And I can help.
Am I the Right Therapist for You?
Therapy works best when there's a good fit between therapist and client. Here's how to know if we might work well together.
We're likely a good fit if:
✓ You're currently pregnant after miscarriage, stillbirth, TFMR, or baby loss
✓ You're experiencing hypervigilance (checking for blood, obsessive Googling, scan anxiety)
✓ You're struggling with emotional cushioning - keeping the baby at arm's length, just in case
✓ You can't bond with this pregnancy because you're terrified of losing it
✓ You're having intrusive thoughts about something going wrong
✓ You're experiencing guilt for not feeling joyful, or shame for being "too anxious"
✓ You want trauma-focused therapy, not just reassurance
✓ You're open to processing what happened in your previous pregnancy/loss
✓ You want a specialist who understands the layers of PAL, not a generalist or counsellor
We may not be a good fit if:
✗ You're primarily seeking grief counseling for your loss (I focus on supporting current pregnancy, not primary grief work)
✗ You want therapy that's just about "staying positive" or breathing exercises (I do trauma-focused work)
✗ You're not currently pregnant and are focused on trying to conceive (I specialise in pregnancy after loss, not TTC anxiety)
✗ You're looking for someone to tell you "everything will be fine this time" (I can't predict outcomes, but I can help you navigate the fear)
What My Clients Say
"The process was as smooth as can be, and from our first chat, where I unloaded all my burdens, my fears, where Aleksandra understood all that I had gone through, I felt a ray of hope that perhaps I could one day enjoy the pregnancy that was passing too quickly for me."
- Anonymous client, Pregnancy After Loss Therapy
Q&A-
Pregnancy after loss isn't something you can "positive-think" your way through. The hypervigilance, the inability to bond, the scan-day panic - these are trauma symptoms. They need trauma treatment.
CBT for pregnancy after loss has been shown in research to significantly reduce anxiety and improve bonding. You're not weak for needing support - you're wise for seeking it.
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No. Trauma-focused therapy is about processing what happened so it has less grip on you - not about re-traumatising you. We work at your pace, with tools to keep you regulated.
The goal is to help you differentiate this pregnancy from that loss - so you can be present in this pregnancy without constantly reliving what happened before.
-
Therapy isn't just about "making this pregnancy work out."
It's about:
- Reducing the torture of living in constant fear
- Giving you tools to navigate this pregnancy with more steadiness
- Processing previous trauma so it doesn't control you
- Building resilience for whatever comes nextEven if the unthinkable happens, you'll have:
- Coping tools
- Trauma processing skills
- A foundation of supportBut my hope - and the goal - is that you get through this pregnancy feeling more grounded, more connected, and less consumed by dread.
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Most clients with pregnancy after loss work with me for 6-12 sessions, though some continue throughout pregnancy.
Why 6 sessions minimum?
- Sessions 1-3: Trauma processing + nervous system regulation
- Sessions 4-6: Bonding work + scan-day coping + birth preparation -
If you experience loss during our work together, we'll shift focus to:
- Acute grief support
- Processing this loss
- Deciding together whether to pause or continueYou won't be abandoned. And you won't be charged for sessions during acute loss if you need to pause.
Common Questions About Therapy for Pregnancy After Loss
Haven’t found what you’re looking for?
I’m happy to assist further. Simply complete the contact form, and I’ll be in touch to answer any specific questions or discuss your individual needs.
Ready to Reclaim This Pregnancy?
You don't have to keep white-knuckling your way through this pregnancy alone.
With the right support, you can:
- Wake up without immediately Googling symptoms
- Get through scans without feeling like you're going to collapse
- Make space for cautious connection with this baby
- Feel steady instead of constantly braced for disaster
This pregnancy doesn't have to be defined by the trauma of what came before.
You can carry both the fear and the hope. And you don't have to do it alone.